Got You By The Balls

Falcon leaned across the table, lowering his voice like a late-night radio host chasing a conspiracy.

“Tell me something,” he said. “You’ve been around the music industry, Hollywood, the big charity galas… What do you know about old man Rothschild’s big balls? The fancy ones. The masked ones. The ones where the billionaires whisper like kings.”

Across from him sat Britney Spears, stirring her drink slowly.

She laughed.

“Oh honey,” she said, “you mean the aristocrat masquerade circuit? The tuxedos, the opera glasses, the people pretending they run the world?”

Falcon nodded.

“Exactly. Those.”

Britney leaned back in the booth.

“You think that’s power?” she said. “A ballroom full of aging bankers and their weird little rituals?”

Falcon raised an eyebrow.

“So you’ve been?”

Britney smiled mysteriously.

“I’ve seen enough,” she replied. “Enough to know the mythology around the Rothschild family is half smoke and half theater.”

Falcon tapped his recorder.

“So what happens at these so-called slumber parties of the elite?”

Britney tilted her head.

“Mostly old men trying to feel important,” she said. “Gold plates, secret handshakes, and people acting like the 19th century never ended.”

Falcon laughed.

“But you said you could bring down Le Baron’s whole operation.”

Britney’s smile faded just a little.

“Oh I could,” she said calmly. “But the funny thing about empires…”

She slid her sunglasses on.

“…is they usually collapse all by themselves.”

Falcon looked at his recorder, stunned.

“Now that,” he muttered, “is a headline.”

Britney’s Vacation Day 1 With Dr. Kovac

The next night, the Adriatic air was warm and calm as a car wound along the coastal road toward the ancient stone walls of Dubrovnik.

Inside the car sat Britney Spears with DJ Kangkine and DJ Doubloon.

DJ Doubloon pointed toward the glowing medieval fortress.

“Tonight you’re seeing something special,” he said. “Real Croatian culture.”

They passed through the gates of the old city and entered the historic fortress theater at Lovrijenac Fortress, famous for hosting Shakespeare during the Dubrovnik summer festival.

The crowd quieted as the play began.

On stage appeared Goran Višnjić, dressed in black as Hamlet.

He spoke the famous line into the night air:

“To be… or not to be…”

The audience was spellbound.

Britney leaned forward, whispering, “He’s incredible.”

After the performance, DJ Kangkine led Britney backstage through a narrow stone corridor.

Goran Višnjić greeted them warmly.

“Welcome to Dubrovnik,” he said, smiling.

Britney hugged him.

“That performance… wow.”

Goran laughed softly.

“You know,” he said, “people remember me as Dr. Kovac from ER. Sometimes that doctor never really leaves you.”

He led them to a small wooden table covered with jars, herbs, and tea.

Britney looked curious.

“What’s all this?”

Goran spoke calmly.

“Old Dalmatian remedies. Pine needle tea. Dandelion root. Wild herbs from the mountains.”

DJ Doubloon nodded proudly.

“Dr. Kovac holistic medicine.”

Goran poured a warm cup of herbal tea.

“Sometimes the mind just needs nature again,” he said gently. “Not more pills.”

Britney held the cup, her hands trembling slightly.

“For years,” she said quietly, “they kept telling me I needed stronger medication.”

Goran shook his head softly.

“Sometimes the strongest medicine is simply being free.”

They sat quietly in the candlelit room of the ancient fortress.

Britney took a sip.

A long moment passed.

Then tears began rolling down her cheeks.

But she was smiling.

“Tears of joy,” she said. “I finally feel… clear.”

Outside, the bells of Dubrovnik Old Town echoed through the night while the Adriatic waves rolled against the ancient walls. DJ Kangkine whispered:

“Welcome back, Britney.”

And under the Croatian stars, Britney Spears cried and laughed at the same time, feeling a peace she hadn’t felt in years.

Back Taxes

Britney sat on the edge of the balcony chair, sunglasses still on even though the sun had gone down.
Her voice was small, tired.

Britney:
“They say I owe them again. Back taxes. Like I’m some criminal. After everything… they talk about jail like it’s nothing.”

Falcon didn’t sit. He paced. Hands clenched. Jaw tight.

Falcon:
“Yeah. That’s how the machine talks. Cold. Mechanical. No mercy. They grind people down and call it justice.”

He pulled a laptop onto the table and hit play.

Falcon:
“Watch this. Aaron Russo made it before they tried to erase him.”

On the screen, America: Freedom to Fascism flickered to life. Words like IRS, power, fear, control rolled past.

Britney watched silently, eyes fixed, breathing slow.

Britney:
“So… I make music. I dance. I pay them millions. And somehow I’m the danger?”

Falcon laughed — but it wasn’t funny.

Falcon:
“Exactly. You’re visible. You’re taxable. You’re human. That’s the crime.”

He shut the laptop, suddenly angry.

Falcon:
“You know what makes me sick? Really sick?”

Britney looked up.

Falcon:
“Guys like George W. Bush. Fortunate son. Born into oil and power. A million Iraqis dead — and he sleeps fine. No cell. No trial. Immune from The Hague like he’s royalty.”

He stopped pacing. Put a hand on the table to steady himself.

Falcon:
“That injustice? It makes me want to puke.”

Britney swallowed.

Britney:
“So the rules only apply to people without armor.”

Falcon:
“Exactly. Paper armor. Legal armor. Flags and tribunals that only point one direction.”

She took off her sunglasses. Her eyes were clear, but hardened.

Britney:
“I’m tired of being hunted.”

Falcon softened, voice dropping.

Falcon:
“In this story — the one we’re telling — I get you out. Somewhere the air is clean. Somewhere the sun heals instead of interrogates.”

Britney:
“Croatia?”

He nodded.

Falcon:
“Old Europe. Stone cities. Sea wind. No circus. No cameras screaming ‘owe us.’ Just… breathing.”

She looked back toward the dark ocean.

Britney:
“I don’t want power. I just want peace.”

Falcon exhaled.

Falcon:
“And that’s the most dangerous thing of all to them.”

The waves below crashed — steady, indifferent to empires, tribunals, and tax codes — like they always had.